Anxiety and Executive Functioning Challenges During the Holidays: What Parents Need to Know From a Parent Coach

The holiday season is painted as a time of joy, connection, and celebration—but for many families, it also brings a surge of stress, heightened emotions, and logistical chaos. Between disrupted routines, increased social demands, travel, sensory overload, and the pressure to “make everything magical,” both children and parents can find themselves more overwhelmed than festive.

What often goes unnoticed is how deeply holiday-related stress impacts a child’s executive functioning skills—the mental processes responsible for flexibility, organization, emotional regulation, planning, and follow-through. And when executive functioning dips, anxiety tends to rise right along with it.

If your child becomes more reactive, disorganized, resistant, or anxious during the holidays, you’re not alone. Parent coaching provides extra support to help you understand these shifts and respond with confidence. Here are some reasons from a parent coach why this happens and what you can do to support your child (and yourself) through the season.

Why the Holidays Can Trigger Anxiety and Executive Functioning Difficulties

1. Routines Get Disrupted

School breaks, late bedtimes, long car rides, travel, and irregular mealtimes all shake the sense of predictability children rely on. For kids who thrive on structure and routines, this may show up as:

• Difficulty transitioning

• Irritability

• Trouble sleeping

• Emotional outbursts

• Resistance to new or unexpected plans

2. There’s More Sensory Input Everywhere

Lights, music, crowds, noisy gatherings, and sugar overload all hit at once. For children with anxious tendencies or sensory sensitivities, the holidays can feel like a constant stream of overwhelm.

3. Social Expectations Increase

Kids are expected to:

• Make small talk with relatives

• Sit through long meals

• Share toys

• Participate in unfamiliar traditions

• Be “on” socially for extended periods

This is especially tough for children who struggle with social anxiety, impulsivity, or emotional regulation.

4. Pressure to Have Fun Can Backfire

Parents want their children to enjoy the holidays. Kids feel that pressure—even when it’s unspoken. For an anxious child, “You should be happy!” can translate to: “Something is wrong with me if I’m not having fun.”

This mismatch fuels shame and further anxiety.

5. Executive Functioning Is Taxed by All the Extra Steps

The holidays involve:

• Packing

• Waiting

• Sharing space

• Following multi-step directions

• Managing transitions

• Flexibly shifting from one activity to another

For kids with executive functioning challenges, these demands stack up quickly.

Signs Your Child’s Anxiety or Executive Functioning Skills Are Struggling During the Holidays

You might notice:

• Meltdowns or shutdowns

• Increased clinginess

• Difficulty following directions

• Forgetfulness

• Trouble waiting or sharing

• Sensory overwhelm in stores or events

• Trouble starting or stopping activities

• Overreactions to small changes

• Refusing outings, activities, or family gatherings

These behaviors aren’t misbehavior—they’re signs that your child is operating with reduced capacity due to stress.

How Anxiety and Executive Functioning Interact During the Holidays

When anxiety rises, executive functioning drops. When executive functioning drops, anxiety rises.

It becomes a cycle:

1. Lack of structure → child feels overwhelmed

2. Overwhelm → child becomes anxious

3. Anxiety → executive functioning weakens

4. Weak EF → more rigid behavior, avoidance, or dysregulation

Understanding this helps parents respond with empathy rather than frustration.

How Parents Can Support Their Child During the Holiday Season

1. Protect Predictability Where You Can

You don’t need to recreate the school schedule—but a bit of consistency goes a long way. Try to keep:

• Regular wake times

• Meal/snack routines

• Familiar bedtime routines

Use visual schedules when possible—especially for travel days or busy weeks.

2. Prepare Your Child for What’s Coming

Anxiety thrives in the unknown. Try:

• Previewing the day’s plan

• Showing photos of relatives or houses they’ll visit

• Giving scripts for greetings (“You can wave instead of giving a hug”)

• Discussing sensory expectations

Even a 2-minute heads-up helps.

3. Build in Downtime

Kids need breaks from stimulation and socializing. Create:

• A quiet room at gatherings

• A break bag (headphones, fidget toys, books)

• A code word your child can use when they need space

Downtime is not optional for anxious or sensory-sensitive children—it’s essential.

4. Break Big Tasks Into Small Steps

Packing, cleaning, or preparing for events can be overwhelming. Give your child one simple task at a time. Examples:

• “Can you bring me three toys to pack?”

• “Put these two items in your bag.”

• “First shoes, then coat.”

This reduces stress for both you and your child.

5. Offer Choices to Build Control

Anxiety decreases when children feel empowered. Try offering:

• Outfit choices

• Activity options

• A say in when to take breaks

• A small job at family gatherings

Even small choices restore calm.

6. Keep Expectations Realistic

Your child’s capacity won’t magically expand because it’s the holiday season. If anything, it may shrink. It’s okay to:

• Leave early

• Skip certain events

• Modify traditions

• Say “no” to extra commitments

Protecting mental health is more important than forced holiday magic.

7. Narrate and Validate Their Experience

When your child feels seen and understood, their nervous system calms. You can say:

• “This is a lot of noise. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed.”

• “Transitions are hard, especially when we’re tired.”

• “Let’s take a break together.”

Validation doesn’t reinforce anxiety—it reduces it.

8. Regulate Together

Co-regulation is powerful. Try:

• Deep breathing as a family

• Short outdoor walks

• Stretching or movement breaks

• Using a calming playlist

When you regulate, your child regulates.

Tips for Parents Navigating Their Own Holiday Stress

Children are highly attuned to parental anxiety. Supporting yourself is part of supporting them.

• Create realistic expectations

• Set boundaries with extended family

• Simplify gifts, meals, and travel plans

• Prioritize sleep where possible

• Choose connection over perfection

• Take brief moments for yourself to reset

Your nervous system sets the tone.

How Can You Help Your Child—and Yourself—Navigate the Holidays More Calmly?

The holidays don’t need to be perfect to be meaningful. When parents understand how anxiety and executive functioning challenges show up this time of year, they’re better equipped to meet their child’s needs with compassion and clarity. For those wanting more guidance, parent coaching with Finding Focus Therapy offers support that can make this season feel more manageable.

By adding structure, reducing overwhelm, preparing ahead, and building in downtime, your family can navigate the season with more connection and less chaos. And when things still feel messy (because they will)—remember that this is normal, expected, and manageable with the right tools and support.

Ready to Bring More Calm and Connection to Your Child’s Holiday Season? Explore Parent Coaching in Boulder County, CO

If your child’s anxiety feels harder to manage during busy seasons, parent coaching in Boulder County, CO can give you the tools and clarity you need. You don’t have to navigate overwhelm, shutdowns, or emotional reactions alone—support is available. Finding Focus Therapy offers guidance to help your family move through stressful moments with more confidence, connection, and calm. Follow these three simple steps to get started:

1. Book a free 15-minute consult to see how parent coaching in Boulder County, CO can support your child this season.

   
   

2. Connect with a parent coach for simple, effective tools that ease holiday stress.

   
   

3. Build more calm, connection, and confidence as your family navigates the holidays together.

Additional Services Offered at Finding Focus Therapy

As the holidays highlight how stress and shifting routines can impact both kids and adults, many families find themselves needing more practical support beyond seasonal strategies. At Finding Focus Therapy, I offer executive functioning support for parents, adults, and young adults who want to feel calmer, confident, and capable—especially during busy seasons like the holidays. Together, we’ll uncover what’s getting in the way of your routines and design realistic systems that make it easier to plan ahead, manage time, and stay grounded when life feels overwhelming. For parents, coaching focuses on balancing family responsibilities with self-care; for adults and young adults, it’s about finding clarity, consistency, and confidence in work, relationships, and personal growth.

Beyond strengthening executive functioning skills, the goal is lasting change—creating supportive routines that work in real life, not just on paper. In a collaborative and nonjudgmental space, we’ll build habits and mindsets that help you feel organized, focused, and ready to enjoy what matters most. You can also explore my blog for more brain-based strategies and practical tools to help you thrive through every season.

About the Author

Liz Morrison, LCSW, is a therapist and executive functioning coach based in Boulder, CO, and the founder of Finding Focus Therapy. Drawing on more than ten years of clinical experience, Liz helps adults, young adults, and parents develop the skills and systems that bring more calm, clarity, and confidence to daily life. She knows how challenging it can be to manage competing demands while staying connected to what truly matters, and she approaches every session with warmth, curiosity, and practical tools designed to make real change possible. Her work combines evidence-based methods with a supportive, relatable style that empowers clients to feel grounded and capable—even when life feels chaotic.

Outside of one-on-one work, Liz provides training and workshops for schools, organizations, and community programs. These interactive sessions give participants actionable strategies for managing stress, improving focus, and maintaining balance in their everyday routines. Whether she’s supporting parents navigating family dynamics or adults rebuilding structure after burnout, Liz is dedicated to helping people move from feeling overwhelmed to feeling organized, confident, and in control.