Executive Functioning for Parents: What It Is and Why It Matters

If you've ever found yourself juggling five things at once, forgetting an appointment, or yelling "shoes on!" for the tenth time before school, you're not alone. Parenting, by nature, is an executive functioning marathon. Yet many of us have never even heard the term—let alone considered how understanding it could make our lives easier.

Executive functioning for parents isn't just a buzzword used in school reports or ADHD assessments. It’s a set of essential mental skills that impact nearly every part of our daily lives—from getting out the door in the morning to handling conflict calmly, from paying bills on time to building healthy routines for our kids. And here's the kicker: your own executive functioning directly shapes how your children develop theirs.

What Is Executive Functioning?

Executive functioning is a group of mental skills that help us manage time, plan ahead, stay organized, regulate emotions, and follow through on tasks. Think of them as the "air traffic control" system of the brain—keeping everything moving in the right direction, even when life gets chaotic.

There are three core areas of executive function:

• Working memory – the ability to hold and use information in the short term (e.g., remembering the bedtime routine steps).

• Inhibitory control – impulse control and self-regulation (e.g., staying calm when your child melts down).

• Cognitive flexibility – the ability to shift gears and adapt to new situations (e.g., when your day doesn't go as planned—again).

These skills don’t fully mature until the mid-20s—and some adults (especially those with ADHD, anxiety, or trauma histories) still struggle. But they can be supported and strengthened at any age.

Why Executive Functioning Matters for Parents

Being a parent requires executive functioning on overdrive. You’re constantly planning meals, managing schedules, navigating emotions (your child’s and your own), and handling transitions.

When executive function skills are strong, daily life feels more manageable. You’re more likely to:

• Create routines that work

• Follow through on goals (hello, laundry system!)

• Set consistent boundaries with your kids

• Recover more quickly from stressful moments

• Model emotional regulation and organization for your children

When those skills are lagging, everything feels harder—more reactive, more scattered, more exhausting.

Common Executive Functioning Struggles in Parenthood

Even highly capable adults can find their executive functioning taxed by the demands of parenting. As an executive functioning coach, common challenges I've seen include:

• Time blindness: Underestimating how long things take (e.g., thinking you can pack lunches in 5 minutes—spoiler: you can't).

• Task initiation: Struggling to get started on things you know you should do (e.g., calling to schedule a dentist appointment).

• Emotional regulation: Losing your cool more often than you’d like.

• Mental fatigue: Feeling like you’re constantly spinning plates and can’t remember what’s important.

• Inconsistent routines: Knowing a system would help, but not knowing how to build or stick to one.

The good news? Awareness is the first step—and small changes make a big difference.

Supporting Executive Functioning at Home

You don’t need to overhaul your life to improve executive function. Try starting with these steps:

1. Externalize the Invisible

Use visual schedules, whiteboards, Post-Its, phone alarms, or shared calendars. The more you can see the tasks, the less your brain has to hold them.

2. Break It Down

Big tasks are overwhelming. Break them into smaller steps (e.g., “clean the kitchen” becomes “clear table,” “load dishwasher,” “wipe counters”).

3. Build Routines

Routines reduce decision fatigue. Start with just one: a morning checklist, a weekly family meeting, or a Sunday night plan-ahead session.

4. Use Transitions Wisely

Give yourself and your kids 5-minute warnings before switching activities. It helps with emotional regulation and mental flexibility.

5. Practice Self-Compassion

You won’t always get it right. That’s okay. Progress, not perfection, is the goal.

Modeling for Your Kids

Children learn executive functioning through experience—not instruction. They need to see you:

• Making and adjusting plans

• Recovering from mistakes

• Naming your feelings and calming yourself down

• Staying organized with tools that work for you

You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to be transparent and intentional. Try saying:

-“I forgot to send in the field trip form. I’m going to set a reminder on my phone next time.”

-“I’m feeling overwhelmed. I need a five-minute break to reset before we talk about this.”

These moments teach kids more than a lecture ever could.

Final Thoughts

Executive functioning isn’t about being superhuman. It’s about creating systems, habits, and mindsets that support the incredibly complex job of parenting. When you take the time to understand and strengthen these skills in yourself, you set your whole family up for more calm, more connection, and more success.

Stay tuned for more posts in this series, including:

• Building Kid-Friendly Routines That Stick

• Executive Functioning and ADHD: What Parents Need to Know

• Time Management Hacks for Busy Families

• How to Help Your Child With Transitions (Without Meltdowns)

You’re doing more than you realize—and with a little structure and support from Finding Focus Therapy, you can feel more in control of the chaos.

Find Support With Executive Functioning For Parents in Boulder County, CO

If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed by the daily demands of parenting, support for executive functioning for parents in Boulder County, CO can help you find your footing. With the right tools and guidance, you can build routines, improve organization, and feel more in control. At Finding Focus Therapy, we’re here to help you create a calmer, more connected family life. Follow these three simple steps to get started:

1. Schedule a free 15-minute consultation to see if executive skills coaching is right for you

2. Begin meeting with supportive executive functioning coach, Liz Morrison

3. Start feeling more in control!

Additional Services Offered at Finding Focus Therapy

At Finding Focus Therapy, I provide personalized executive skills coaching for parents, adults, and young adults who want to feel more capable and in control of their day-to-day lives. From improving organization and time management to making decisions with greater ease, I help clients develop practical strategies to handle life’s demands. Along with supporting parents, I also work with adults navigating career responsibilities, relationships, and personal aspirations. While strengthening executive functioning is a key part of our work, our sessions aim to create lasting, positive changes in every area of life. Coaching offers a supportive, goal-oriented environment where you can overcome obstacles and move forward with clarity and confidence. Visit my blog to learn more about executive functioning and how it can benefit you.